Heavy

Weighed down

By life and all that it has brought me

Success outweighs struggle

Triumph reigns over tragedy

Mind over matter

Love defeats lust….or that’s what I always tell myself even as I usually lean in the direction of the latter majority of the time

Look in the mirror

Face the man staring back at me

I can’t blame any of this on my father

Spent so many years hating him and now as twenty something year old I’ve become him

Repent

Pray for my soul

Bathe in the purest of waters

Here I am

On this snow and ice covered dark back road

Driving at breakneck speeds

With bald tires and bad brakes

Careening into an embankment

What now?

How do I get out of this?

Lord don’t forget your promises to me

YOU PROMISED ME

Don’t leave me now

Death

Rebirth

Alive

Heart pulsating in anticipation of what my new life will bring

So much has been given

But much more remains

The rain cloud has gone from my life

Now only sunshine is what's left

© 2012

Steve Logan

All Rights Reserved

Last Rites

We come here today to send off a tortured soul

Removed the wretched life he lived

Years of depression had set in

Smiling was all but halted

If it wasn’t a blank stare then you could expect a frown

Grown tired of chasing dreams and became complacent

Holy water sprinkled down from above but due to the venom that inhabited his veins it evaporated

Clinching the rosary so unyielding……blood begins to flow from my hands

The true definition of praying until it hurts

What was the point of it all?

I still fear that my soul is sentenced to dwell in anguish

Broken promises to myself but above all I broke promises made to my Father

Asking for forgiveness and continued blessings…only to ignore them and black slide

I deserve nothing more than the nightmare I was living

So bury me

Had plenty of dirt thrown on me during my time

What difference does a few shovelfuls more matter?

Perform the eulogy

Lower the casket into the ground

This world is over for me….the me I used to be

Now I take steps forward to start my new life

© 2012

All Rights Reserved