Used to
Looking back on my past sometimes I laugh, shed tears and even sit still in awe of how far I’ve come
Used to
Be addicted to pain medication
Pill popping like there was no tomorrow or at least in my mind I felt it wasn’t
Taking pulls from the Jack Daniels bottle to chase them down
The horrors of life were too much for me
I couldn’t walk through this world without being inebriated
Used to
Be narcissistic
The physical world I lived in didn’t exist
Only delusions I had conjured up in my head
Afraid to look in the mirror, thinking about how I would finally see that it’s always been me standing in my way
Used to
Envision myself as such a playa, never thinking of the future
But now that I am staring down the barrel of thirty
I am only left to wonder…..have I already ran off the one?
She may have loved me more than life itself but it’s only so much bullshit you can tolerate
Used to
Be afraid of my flaws
Never wanting to admit that I’m nowhere near as great as I wish I was
I used to be a lot of things
But I will be so much more in the future.
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