If He Breaks Your Heart

I know

I had my chance



I know

You’ve moved on



I also know

That I am always here for you



Rest assured

If he is a fool like me

And doesn’t appreciate you

Breaks your heart

I’ll be right here

To help you pick up the pieces

Start our love over

What is old is now new again

Because I am a new man

Done with all the games I played in the past

I love you

Not wishing you any bad luck

But if he breaks your heart

I’ll be right here



© 2010

Boo Season

Chilly days


Cold nights

All I want

Is some I can hold tight

No need to give us a name

Relationships are all hype

But its snowing

Saying a winter storm is headed this way

You don’t have to go home

And I don’t want to be alone

The wind chill factor is in the negative digits

Snow on the ground

Layer up on the clothing

Boo Season

Time to get with it

In the summer time

We break away

No hard feelings

Unless you want to stay

But now lets just focus on the present

No need to rush into a future

Enjoy our time for the moment

No need to worry about the sticker price

Things have already been taken care of

Gift wrapped for you

Time to own it

Hot Nights

She calls me


Saying

"I need you"

"Can you come over?"



I put on my pull over

Just like the economy

I bail out

Headed for her house



Rain hits

My windshield

Faster than

The wipers move



I open the door

She gives me a look

Non verbally saying

"I've been waiting for you"



The animal in me kicks in

Kissing and touching

She says

"Take your time this is your's for life"

(C)

Drug of Choice

Roll you up


Ever so tightly

Light you up

And then I…….

Inhale

You feel my lungs

But I never cough



You are my white powder train

Powerfully addictive

I should call you cocaine

I snort you in through my nose

Then tilt my head back and let the pleasure set in



My heroin

You are stronger

Than any other morphine derivative

Where you lead I follow

You are the speed ball

For my needle to swallow



The pill that I pop

And I can’t stop

Or is it because I don’t want to stop?

Never felt this good

To be lifted this high

You’re the only drug I’m addicted to now



© 2010

Yesterday

Can we go back


To the days of the past

Wishing that the good times

Would always last

Me and you

You and I

Down to the earth you were

But still so fly

My lady

My baby

The woman I wanted to marry

White picket fence

The dream

But it will never happen

You decided your love for me

Had ran its course

When you told me you were going out

With your “friend”

It was him

The man that would beat you

Get you knocked up twice

I was the one you stayed away from

But you made him your vice?

Should’ve been me and you together

Weddings bells and our families throwing rice

Today I can say that I’m finally over you

But I also can’t forget about yesterday



© 2010

Devil's Pitchfork

Get back Satan

You keep trying to tempt me

With forbidden fruit

The devil comes in many forms from what I was told

Be it male or female

You will be able to tell by their actions

Hiding their evil motives

Eventually the horns will be shown



© 2010

Shy

Pardon me


I hope you don’t reject me

After I built up the courage to come and talk to you

Let me introduce myself

My name is Steve and yours is?

That’s a beautiful name

Don’t be alarm by me kissing your hand

Not suggestive meant by it

Just showing a lady the affection this gentleman has for her

I see you walking around this building in the morning all the time

We speak

I really enjoy your smile

It makes me feel like the world isn’t that bad of a place

The way your hair sways from side to side in a fluid motion

Then after we greet

You pass me

I catch a sniff of you

I recognize the fragrance

I can also tell you took time to pick out how

How it perfectly complements your natural scent

If you have a man

He can’t treat you as good as I can

There is no way he can make you smile as much as me

Laugh

Feel like you’re on cloud nine

Wake up and leave the house

With a smile on your face

Send I love you texts during the day

When you walk in from a long day show you

How much I miss you

All this and more

If you will be mine



© 2010

Heavy With The Words

The ladies often say
I say the sweetest things
I say them with such conviction
Because at the time I believe them
Whether or not the feelings will change
Like the direction of the winds
Who knows
Finding a new muse
But that doesn’t mean that eye still doesn’t wander
Think about what could’ve been
If you were mine
Maybe in another time
We could be together
Right now the time isn’t right
Blame my mind playing tricks on me
Starting off hot and heavy
Then going ice cold
Out of the blue
Not being consistent
You don’t deserve it
And I don’t deserve you
I’m not ready
Sounds like a copout but it’s far from that
Admittance is the first step to recovery
 
 
© 2010

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Heavy Heart

I look in the mirror
And I see
A tortured soul
Too much stress
Making me look old
A heavy heart
Carrying the pain
Of unresolved issues
From loved ones that are gone
Harder to smile with each day
News is never good
Even when its no news at all
Just gives me more time to think
About how I’ve lost control of my life
Never will be able to gain control of it again
Too far off the road
Hitched into the marsh
In my last moments
I think of how I’ve hurt many
I’m sorry
It won’t make things better
But maybe knowing that I am no longer walking amongst you
Will lessen the pain
 
© 2010

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The Painter

The brush is moist
Broad strokes
It seems
There is little thinking involved
Just action
Happens every time
I paint my muse
Brushing up and down
Then clockwise
You seem tense
But whatever you're holding back
Is released
Once things go counter
Paint dripping
You scream
THIS IS IT!!
Pleased with the master piece
That I just painted for you
However you can't speak
Just lay there and smile

(C) 2010

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Taken for Granted

As soon
As you open your mouth
A finger appears
Always pointing at me
What did I do now?
Can we please have a week of happiness at least?
You fill yourself falling for me
Then pull away
No one can guard your heart better than you
Please understand
Baby
I'm a damn good man
But I am also far from week
You keep waiting for the other shoe to drop
Flaws on display
Ask and you shall find what you seek
Got a soft spot for you
However I'm strong enough to know
You will never change
So its best I go

(C) 2010

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Waking Up To You

Sleeping with a
Smile on my face
Dreaming of
Waking up to you

Thoughts racing through my head
The way my heart jumps through my chest
When I
Wake up to you

You're better
Than any kind of coffee or tea
I can slurp on you
Better than any alarm clock
To wake up to

Now that you're awake
And have feed me
I now provide you
A world of my never ending love
Thank you baby
For letting me
Wake up to you

(C) 2010

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The Mind Wonders

The mind wonders


What it would’ve been like

Had things been different

Not myself

Possibility someone better

Who knows?

Not me for certain

Not the sharpest tool in the drawer

There has to be something greater out here

A place for me

Where I no longer hurt

(C) 2010

Moonlight

I sit here


Perked at the top of this hill

Speaking out loud

Freely

Without fear of being judged

You’re not here next to me

But it’s not your ear

I want to talk to

I’d rather it be your heart

You’re the biggest star

In my constellation

I don’t know how much time I have left

On this earth

Where ever you are

I want you to know

How much I love you

In The Air Tonight

Can you feel it?


The way the winds have shifted

How the air is not thick

Making it hard to breathe

Something is coming

She knows

As she walks into the hotel lobby

For whatever reason

She doesn’t stay at home tonight

A decision that would impact her

For the remainder of her life



A man boards the elevator with her

He comments about how they’re both

Going to the same floor

Innocent as it seems



She gets off

He follows

Turns the same direction as she does

Then drops something

As she slides the key card in and turns the knob

He rushes her

Pushing her inside the room

She fights him with every bit of strength she has

He muffles her screams with his hand



Kicking

Punching

Clawing

She breaks free

Clothes torn

Stubbing out of the room



She runs down the corridor

Screaming for help from room to room

Floor to floor

Finally running outside into the street

A Good Samaritan calls law enforcement

Crisis averted

Or so it seems

Young lady still has trouble sleeping at night

Even when the air is calm

In the night



© 2010

Under Attack

One day


As sure as I am putting pen to paper right now

We will look back on this point in history and call it

The good ole days

Not because they’re actually good

But because

The world is only getting worse

Sad to say

Think of the world

Our children will be growing up in

I wish

I could stop time

Just freeze right now

Cherish the moment

Live for now

The future is not promised

And if you do get to see it

Think of how dark the days will be



© 2010

Sticks n' Stones

Words hurt


Sometimes more

Than we care to admit

Bullying

Isn’t always physical

The verbal aspect

Has longer lasting effects

Sinking deep into the mind

If you bother

To get the know the person

Behind the eyes

A tortured soul

You will find

How long can you

Keep this to yourself?

Pretending like

Everything is alright

Inside

Fires rage

Burning

No one makes it through hell

Without some kind of reminder

Flesh wounds maybe

Or perhaps

The nightmares that same to never end

I think of the ones

Young and old

That have taken their precious life

Over what others have said

I pray your soul finds peace





© 2010

Bleeding Heart

No matter


What my political beliefs may be


I love my country still


They say I am anti you


Not the case


I will forever stand up for you


I just want you to get back


To the greatness that once was


I will speak out against elected officials


Why shouldn’t I ?


They work for me after all


Or so I was told


I salute


All that have serviced and died for you


Past


Present


Future


 
(C) 2010

Snake Bite

The venom
Racing through the temple
Slowly breaking down
Infected
Though they see themselves
As being cursed
How could this happen to me?
First thought
After the receive
The positive results

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The Mirror

Sometimes
It's like I am
In a fun house
From the looks
Of my reflection
You see the smiling
The frowns
How I still have a child inside
And how father time has been unkind
The triumph
The torment
Glory
Gloom
I am a onion
Many layers
Some love me
But get too close
And I will make you cry
Smash the mirror
Or face what is looking back at you

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Motionless

How can we ever
Move forward
If we
Live in the past
Baffled
At how we
Continue
To put the same numbers
Into the equation
But act surprised
When the calculator
Reads the same answer
In order for us
To overcome
We need to move
From the box
That surrounds
And grow

(c) Steve Logan 2010
All Rights Reserved

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Breakup Poem

First off


I’d like to apologize

For things that are about to be said

Just know

This has been on my mind for a long time

The idea of leaving you bouncing around in my head



I remember a time

When I used to get up

And couldn’t wait to hear from you

Now I walk around

Wondering how you find a way to

Twist things around to make

Any wrong my fault



Doesn’t take much these days

You’re easily detached

Guess you have thoughts of

Other men on your mind



If you can’t see

All that I do for you

How I try to make this work

Then you need to get your eyes check

Problems with men of the past

Have made you not want to invest

You emotions



You don’t seem like you want to be here

And if that is the case

You can go

I will not chase someone that doesn’t want to be caught

This isn’t about pride

It’s about me not being able to help you

So I won’t stand in your way

Goodbye my love

(C) Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Novel

You’re a treasure


Every day

I make sure I read another chapter

In your book

The more I read

The more I am intrigued

The more beautiful you are

The more I fall in love with you

Sometimes the story is painful

But then it is followed by things

That warm my heart

And touch my soul

The narration

Never gets old

I don’t bother to count the pages

But they keep multiplying

I guess this means

We still have more to write in this book my love

Anchor

If I say a few words to you
Would you listen?

And not just hear



You see I know

When I talk to you

And say sweet things

Being that I have a way with words

You think it’s all game

I want to assure you sweetheart

I mean every word of it

I want to spend the rest of my life with you

Become a family

I’m not in this

Just to blow your back out

Or use you for you’re money

No

It’s deeper than that

I want your mind

I want to see you every morning when I wake up

I want you to be the one I come home to

After a long day of work

I want to cook dinner together

Give you foot and back massages after you get out of the tub

Lay in bed after our kids are asleep

Reading and discussing bible scriptures



All these things

I ask of you

But before any of that can happen

I ask you

To take my last name

 
(C) Steve Logan 2010
All Rights Reserved

Supernova

My galaxy


Has been

Forever changed

The moment

You entered

My stratosphere

Seems this space air

Became easier to breathe

The stars in this constellation

Now form your face

When you're away from me

I wish on them

In hope that ruler

Of my heart returns soon

(C) Steve Logan  2010
All Rights Reserved

2nd Chances

What have I


Gotten

Myself

Into?



Everything I think that

We

Have crossed over to

The love zone

It seems

You find a reason

To pull away from me

I know I did you wrong

But that was then

And this is now

I am a changed man

Do you see it?



When you agreed

To take me back

I don’t think

You did it

Just to put me through hell

But it seems that all I get from you



If you forgive me

Then do just that

Not saying erase the past



I love you

And want you forever

But you’re pushing me away

(C) 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Are You Lonesome?

Do you miss me?


The nights we used to lay together

The way I used to rub your stomach until you went to sleep

How I would ease out

The bed

Not to be sneaky but to give you more time to rest

How I would have dinner

Waiting for you

After you came home from doing God knows what

House cleaned

Bath water ran

Are you Lonesome?



The way I would

Whisk you out of the tub

Like you were a child

Dry you off

Lotion your body

And console you

On your long day at work

Are You Lonesome?



How about

The way I would let you use me

As your punching bag

Puppet

Fool

Whatever you felt like during our “relationship”

Are You Lonesome?



The way you acted

Using me as a circus monkey

Wanting me to jump through hoops for you

When I did more than I should

Foolish of me

But I walked away with my head held high

You Deserve To Be Lonesome



© Steve Logan 2010

All Rights Reserved

Stand Strong

Never
Will they
Be able to silence us
We are strong
In spirit
Strong
In our mission
To reshape this world
To move away from the hate
On to more love
But not the kind
That you need a latex glove
The kind of love
That you have
For a fellow human
The mean mugs
I get when I speak
Just be friendly
And you stare at me
As if
I just spat
In your face
Ignorance
Has run amok
Together
We can all be one
Stand Strong

(C) Steve Logan 2010
All Rights Reserved

Khalil

My son
I love you

I don't get to
See you as much as
I would like
But the world is not as dark
And my heart warms
When I do see
Your face

A broken home
Mommy and daddy
Couldn't make it work
Even though
All the trying
Doesn't make me love you less
We share the same blood
You are a part of me
I owe you so much
For the joy you have brought me
The countless times
You have saved me from myself

My hero

(C) 2010 Steve Logan

Me

You see me
The 100 watt smile
That I give off
The jokes I tell
But you
Have
No idea
From the people I've hurt
To the ones that have
Loved me so hard
That it caused them great pain
The mirror I look into
Most of the cracks
Have been repaired
But they are still
Visible to the eye
As a reminder
Of the failures
From yesterday

(C) 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Sunday

On this day
I stand
Before you
A new man
Free
Of the chains of my past
The Holy Spirit has come for me
At last
I ask
That you only
Judge me off of
What I do today

(c) Steve Logan 2010
All rights reserved

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The Zone

Can we coexist?
In a way
That is different
From what we hoped?

Is it even worth
Holding on to?

Going from lovers
To friends
Is not ideal
But it appears
Fate had other plans for us

The love I have for you is great

But I am not
“In love”
With you
Maybe one day
I will fall
As always
If I can’t help you
I swear I won’t
Stand in your way

© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Life

Don't take it
For granted
Its not always
All its
Cracked
Up to be
With every day
A change
Is brought about

(c) Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

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Thoughts

Suicide
Once was
My course of action
Not caring that
I would end up in hell for it
Or my loved ones
Reaction

But now
A new day has down
I stand in a different place
I wake up
Just to see the smile
On my son’s face

After years of searching for love
Has it finally found me?
From an unsuspecting person
The thought of her
Potentially crushing my heart in pieces
Makes me fear of love
Worsen

All money
Isn’t good money
But what if that money will help me
Help another?
I would give up all the riches of this world
Just to restore health
To my mother

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Blind Spot

Vision is blurry
One word to describe the current mood
Scary

I put pen to paper
So if this is
My final writing
I want you all to know
That I died like I lived
Fighting

A man standing alone
Facing the impending doom
I turn off my phone
So not to be disturbed
And somehow calls still got through
So I broke into pieces
Where’s the broom?

I know longer have
Ideological thoughts
I feel like a
Nomad

Issues with my father
I want him to answer for his sins
But it falls
On that man

Dreams of finally finding a wife
Rushing home after work
Eating dinner with the kids
Then its lights out and the door is closed

Our bodies kiss
As my heart feels like it will explode
From ecstasy
I never thought a woman
Outside of momma
Could bring out the best in me
I get up with the sun rise
Leaving her a note
Saying
“See you later”

Her favorite breakfast cooked
On a tray beside the bed
I grab her car keys
Go clean it up
Change the oil
Fill up the tank all
Before returning home

She hugs and kisses telling me I’m the best
In the back of my mind I wonder
What will she do next
To put me through a test

Back into the world again
I go visit the old guard
Wisdom in their words
They have forgotten more
Then I will ever know

My mom smiles
As she tells me
“You did good”
All I ever wanted was her approval

Khalil calls me
I tell him I love him
I’ll pick you up tomorrow from school son
Be looking for me

I think how on the way home
As street lights guide my path
I have lived a charmed life
And came a long way
Happiness found me
After I stopped pursing it

Shed light on the dark corners
Blind no more

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Contingency Plan

It doesn’t
Make me proud to write this
Knowing that you
Gave your all to me
While I was still holding back

The biggest hurdle
With love
Is believing
That once you fall
Someone
Will be there
To catch you

So I strung
You along
Loose ends hung

Saying I was in love with you
When I was still
Out playing like
I was single
Being a typical man
One girl to the next
Just want to mingle

Love is a chess board
And you showed me
Checkmate baby

Best laid plans
Go
To waste


© 2010 Steve Logan

Name Game

She tells me
I am her dream man
The perfect guy
I tell her I am
Just a mere mortal
Knowing in the back of my head
This will not last
Eyes racing back and fourth
As my attention can’t be held by one
I tell her I love her
Because I mean it
That’s why I will break this off
Suddenly
Not even leaving a “Dear Jane” letter
Its better this way
Rather than have her wait for other shoe to drop
I abandon her
I often say
I will be alone forever
Not by choice per say
But by stupidity
Subconsciously
I find a way to the nearest exit
My convoluted logic
Tells me its better
For her to hate me
Than for me to hurt her

© 2010
All Rights Reserved

Misunderstood

It will take time
To solve the rubix cube
That is me
Complex individual
Passionate
But willing to submit to reasonable logic
Arrogant
But humble
Standoffish loner of the night
Like Batman
But a beacon of shining hope
Ala Superman
Hero mixed with villain
Poet Monday – Saturday
Preacher on Sunday
Soul speaker by God’s gift
Myth destroyer by trade
Momma was more of a saint
Daddy a glorified sinner
Heart is always in the right place
But my mind gets me in and out of jams
A poetic rebel
Underground emcee chip on my shoulder
Size of a bolder used to be a pebble
Adding value to the shock
Master thief picked the lock
So you can never place in your box

© 2010
All Rights Reserved

Breaking Dawn

Sitting on this hill
I see the sun
Peek over the horizon
Another day
Another opportunity
To be great
To erase
I bathe in sun light
Solar rays
Empower me
Strength I need
To face a new beginning
It was
Well worth it
Traveling through
The night
Mark my words
On this day
I will reach new heights

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Closure

Hey you
I bet you thought
I was gone forever
Destined
To be a part of the past
The hate
And distain
You must feel for me
Brings me shame
But at some point
The time between
We hadn’t talked
Got to far
A loss for words
……
I am not ready for a woman
Like you
And I realize this now
If I am lucky
When I am ready
My lady will be a fraction of you
Don’t wait up
You deserve better

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Classified Information

I will die
With this
Secret
It may be obvious
To the world
But if I never admit
Their right
It’s just speculation
But how long
Can I do this?
They say if you can’t
Love the one you want
Love the one you’re with
The one I really love
Doesn’t know
A friend of mine
I am too shy to tell her
So I just pretend I only want the friendship
How long before she notices
I go to the other room
To talk to my
“Friend”
Feel like I am cheating
Though there has been no physical interaction
I would welcome it
And not think twice
Do I sacrifice a sure thing?
For the great unknown
Lose a friend
But what if I gain a wife?
Decisions
Decisions

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Levitate

I don’t consider
Myself
Stuck up
I just
Prefer
Not to participate
In the behind
The back
Chit
Chat
It’s easier to be positive
So I wonder why
Most focus on the negative
But there is good in this world
If you wipe off the dirt and debris
You will find gold hidden beneath


© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

My People

My People
We got to do better
Not just to keep up
With the Jones’
But do it for self
Aren’t you tired?
Of being a joke
Notice how
They
Only interview the one
That looks like they just
Rolled out of bed
And completely ignore
The one in the suit
That has knowledge floating
Around their head
Don’t tell me
That is how you were raised
Break the cycle
Aim higher
Evolve
Seems like we’re comfortable
Playing the monkey at the circus
And that isn’t disrespect to anyone specific
But if the shoe fits
Then you need to wear it
We need to change
To elevate
Only we
Can fix us

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Rainy Days

Rainfall
Sitting here looking out my window
I see water pellets crawl
I need my caffeine fix
Especially now
This weather was made for rest
But there is no rest for the weary
Hail hits the roof
As I take a sip of tea
To calm me
The glow from the computer screen
Is the only light I am willing
To have right now
Praying the power doesn’t go out
Nothing worse than being alone
In a blackout
The weather breaks
Only for the moment
To give way to more gloom
Rain
Rain
Go
Away

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Spirit over Body

My flesh
Yearns
For the soft comforting
Kiss of woman’s skin
Against mine
My spirit
Keeps me strong
Laying down
With just anyone
Would only serve a temporary want
That I have been lead to believe
I need
Ejaculation last for a matter of seconds
But what about
How I feel afterwards?
Knowing that I used her
How can I look myself in the mirror?
How do I face my God?
Knowing that I went back on a promise
That I need to him
The conclusion of this unholy
Union of bodies
Turns to be anticlimactic
Serves me right
After went about such
A lustful tactic
Wickedness
Forgive me
I keep the faith
Pray my past sinful nature
Will not override the holy ghost
This body is spoken for
My Father
Has promised it to my future wife

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

What Does It All Mean?

I often
Find myself
Sitting alone
Pondering
What is this all about?
Life
How will it end?
Old age
Natural causes
Gun or knife
If I am killed at a crack house
Does that mean I was a user?
Maybe I was there
Ministering to lost souls
The dead
Are unable
To vocalize
But they still tell a story
I finally found Christ
At the age of twenty-five
If I don’t get to see twenty-six
Was it all for not?
My soul was saved
But finding God may have
Brought about the final chapter
In my book
Who knows?
Don’t everybody raise your hands at once
Just the thoughts of you narrator
Don’t mind me
I will just keep writing

© 2010 Steve Logan
All Rights Reserved

Living Dead

I am here
But not really
I walk amongst you
But can’t be seen
I live in this world
But I am not of it
What good is it
To be clean
On the outside
But the inside
Needs a power washer
To rid the dirt
The new me was born
So to make room
The old me has been laid
To rest
Renewed
Influenced by the holy ghost
While standing exposed
Showing the whole me
Here I am Lord
I surrender
It all to you

© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Here Without You

They say
Putting someone
You love
In the ground
Is the hardest part
Once that’s done
Then the healing can start
I can’t help but
Replay
Them lowering
The casket
Into the ground
It isn’t fair
But is life ever?
The answer is simple
Never
So now I must
Adjust
To life without you
For you
Are in a better place
But I
I am still
Right here
As I keep you
In my heart

© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Last Rites

Here we are
Paying respects
To the dead and gone

I miss you
…..

Think I can speak
For everyone else
When I say
That you lived a long life
Stories of your past
Could fill
Many books

The struggles
The defeats
The victories
The glory

Respect to you
Life will not be the same

Solace
In the fact
That you went peacefully

I can’t wait to see you again
Rest In Peace


© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Momma's Boy

I can’t imagine
The world without you
You brought me
Into this world
Though
At times I wasn’t
The good son
It took a while
I finally grew up
Became a man
Realized everything
You ever told me
Was gospel
The only mother
I will ever have
And I couldn’t
Ask for a better one
I look back
On stupid
Childish
Things I did
And it brings
Tears to my eyes
Because I know
I made you cry
The over night shifts
Making sure you got home
Just in time
To make me breakfast
And wipe the sleep
Out of my eyes
You sacrificed so much
That’s why I buy gifts
On mother’s and father’s day
You raised me right
I love you mom

© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Her

Are you real?
Pardon me
But I need to pinch myself
Feel you
To make sure you’re
Not a
Hologram

You don’t know
How long
I’ve
Dreamed of you

When you’re near
My eyes dance around
Looking for you
Animal instinct kicks in
I must have you

Longing to make
Eye contact
So I can lean in
And taste
Those juicy lips

Fireworks go off
Explosive
This chemical reaction
The yin to my yang
Come together with me

My missing piece

My angel


© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Vanishing Point

Though you never
Physically departed
When I close my eyes
I can
See you walking away
Gone forever
Seems like wasted words
Saying that I love you
How can I honestly say that?
When you walked out the door
Telling me of
Days like this
I was too wrapped up
In my own world
To worry about you
Or anything for the matter
Feelings of love
And happiness when we started
I can’t help but feel like
Because of me
The unknown of our
Failed love
Will forever go
Uncharted
I am always here
If you ever need me
Though
You never will
…………
I had to write this
For you
Fallen love


©2010 Steve Logan – All rights reserved

Alan Keys

Look at you
New age Judas
Only your thirty pieces of silver
Was a seat at the table
Good ole boys club
House nigger
Does the air feel good?
Not having to slave away in the field?
Willie Lynch had the right idea
Turn us against each other
And will destroy each other
But you
I feel sorry for you
There is a special place
In hell reserved
For people
Like
You
Sellouts are no longer
Known as
Uncle Tom
We call them
Alan Keys


© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Storm Clouds

The thunder roars
I look to the sky

As the rain covers my face
I imagine what it would be like to soar
I've tried to force my world of darkness into the light
Taken many loses from countless fights

A recovering addict
But will I ever fully be off the pills?
Destorying my life
When I should be making myself better for my future wife

Just think of my son
The shame he would feel
The world giving his father a raw deal
After this rain out the cracks in the concrete
New growth sprouts

(C)2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Open Letter

I apologize
I failed you
I wasn’t the man
I presented myself to be
At the time we met
I lied to you
Played you for a fool

I wanted you
To fall in love
With me
And it worked

But at what cost?

I ended up alienating
Someone that
Could’ve been a great friend

But now…

Nothing
You don’t talk to me
No more than a brief
Shallow
“Hello”
When you pass me

You have no idea
The sorrow I feel
I miss you

But I can’t….

Bring myself to
Tell you this

I fear

What you might say to me
Sometimes
It’s best to
Leave
The powder keg alone

I wonder….

If one day
We can start again?
Take a eraser
To the past
Wipe the hard drive
Nothing exist

Will you?

Forgive me?


© 2010 Steve Logan
All rights reserved

Her Music Box

The headphones
Go in
Introduction to her day
As she walks to the bus stop
The sees mouths move
But doesn’t make out
What they say

The soundtrack to her life
Every song in this devie
Holds meaning
Some bring rage
While others bring back happier times
Others remind her of current situation
Then there’s the one song
That makes he believe mere mortals can fly

As the harmonies invade her ears
She is pleased
Drowning out life
With each day
Makes the world seem better
The dawn of a bright future
Say goodbye to the past

The lies
Beatings
Cold winter when she was homeless
And all different types of sex to escape it

Born again
Or is this life after death?
Are you ready to die?
No this is all new
She has earned the right
To achieve some type of happieness

© Steve Logan 2010
All rights reserved

Death Of Superman

This piece is simply me fighting my inner demons so that I can become a better person.


Living my dream not a care in the world
Flying around my city observing the citizens then from out of the blue a large object was hurled
I fell full force to the pavement and felt the buildings shake
The pain was too intense in a ball I curled

I looked up to see a large figure eclipsing the sun
This abomination was breathing heavily with a look that all he had was destruction on its mind
I had to defeat this monster to save world, everyone was standing around anticipating this confrontation I yelled to them “RUN!”

We exchanged blows as the day turned into night
I’d never been hit so hard, I put every ounce of strength I still had left in me into a shot to the gut as I watched my adversary fold like a card
As I whaled on his face the calcified exoskeleton began to crack and I was amazed of what I started to see
This monster that I was fighting was a direct reflection of me

Shocked by the sight I had completely forgotten about the fight
My enemy used this to his advantage
He delivered a spike to my head piercing my brain
My body was lifeless before it hit the ground
The news crews were froze with shock and awe and the thought that things would never again be the same

My cape was removed and used as a flag to mark the disaster area that was left after the battle
The crowd morns the lost of their champion
Months later they have no clue that I still protect them from a far
At night when the city is asleep I go to the monument the built in memory of my death and I leave a letter
Stating to all that sometimes you must die in order to be better


© 2010 All rights reserved

Candy Store

This poem that I'm sharing with you all tonight is about my struggle in the path I've chosen. In becoming closer with God to become the man that I am supposed to be there are certain things and in this case activities I have left in the past. This is about the sins of the flesh something I am still getting grips on. Enjoy and God bless.

I used to have
Such a sweet tooth
Wanting to sample
All the flavors

Now I never visit
Not to say
I don't like to tease
My taste buds
I'm just
On a leaner
More healthy diet

Funny
Thinking back
On my past
I used to buy this
Store out

A tiger can change
It's strips

Though the struggle
Is hard
I still walk pass
Shop

My will power
Is greater
Than
Any
Temptation

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

T4 (These Things Take Time)

Can I spend
Eternity
With peace of mind?
I hope
To one day
Achieve
This goal
Walking through
This dark forest
That is my brain

I am careful
To not
Let the thorns
Of negative thinking
Puncture
My skin

The fog
Settles in
Affecting my sight
Blind
So now I am
Forced to
Use my heart
To find the
Greater good

The chill
In the air
Slowly goes away
I feel warmth again

My eyes come back
Into focus
I take in
Beautiful scenery
Leaves bloomed
Flowers have sprouted
A magnificent portrait
Rendered by a great artist

I feel at home

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Just speaking (not a poem)

So I was sitting here reading every poem that I've wrote. Let me just say I have come a long way! Starting out writing poetry as a way to get out hard feelings of heartbreak from my 1st love to now being able to get my point across without the aid of profane language or punch lines.

What brought about this change? Simple and complex in a way like most things in life. I grew up, realizing that the things I was writing I didn't even want to read. There is not a market for hate poetry not to me anyway. Now I still have that passion sans the curse words.

Another thing is my relationship with God. Now I am not nor will I ever claim to be a bible scholar but I find myself sitting down and my pen is moved by someone else. Notice in my latest poems a few of them have religious undertones. That is not to say I won't still write about other topics because trust me I will.

Well that's the long and short of my current journey. Thank you all for taking the time to read this or any of my poems and following my blog. I appreciate you more than you will ever know.

- Steve

Heaven

Heaven
I need a hug
Changing my life
There is
No way
I can
Continue
On this path
I am sure to die
A young death

Self destructive
Speeding down
The highway
Weaving
In and out
Of traffic
Speedometer
Stopped working
It just stuck
At 150
Then the shield cracked

My Lord
My Savior
You saw

That I needed help
A child of you

People always told me
That I'm
A good man
I just fell under
The influence of satan

How can I continue
To live this life?
Nothing changes
If nothing changes

I drop down
To my knees
Arms extended
Anticipating
Heaven's hug

(C) All rights reserved

Walls

If these walls
Could talk
I wonder
What they
Would have to say?
The chipped paint
And dark spots
On this once
Pure white wall
Is like anything
Over time
Slowly decaying
What story

There have been
Many shameful moments
Lots of tears
Then you see
Short burst of
Glory

Watching
The acts of lust
That I thought of
As love
The times I've
Laid on the floor
Alone
Wondering what
Went wrong
So much potential
Wasted
Here I sit now
A grown
Man-child
Looking at
Any sign
Of compassion from
The human race as
A handout

Alcohol
Has stained the carpet
Dent in the floor
When my life
Was saved
I would've hung myself
If not for the
Faulty rope
Back when I was
Full of gloom
And hope

How I've held my son
As he slept on my chest
How I fought with
His mother
When she was trying
To keep us apart
Yes
These walls
Know me
Its a journal
With no words

Now as I sit here
Bible in hand
I am ready to face
This world
I stand
Before you
A better man

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Coffee Bean

Another Monday
I'm blessed
To have
Woken from my slumber
But I'm so tired
Really not feeling
The thought
Of a work day
Let me ingest
My coffee
Adrenaline
Feels my veins
Caffeine
Eases my headache pains
I feel energized


(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Cosmic

Feeling intergalatic
Not
Of this world
Hello earthlings

Maybe that explains
How I've
Been
Frowned upon
And outcasted
All these years

My race
Shuns me
Because I talk
"White"
They say
I call it
Putting my college
Degree to use

Other races
Just see me
As one
Of the
"Others"

I don't care
As I breeze
Between
The clouds

I find
As I
Grow older
I am

More at home
In
Isolation

The chocolate surfer
Herald of God

I have a message for
From up above
I wonder

Will you
Be ready to
Receive it?

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Downpour

Warm
Summer night
Lightning
Has knocked out
The power

We open the windows
To catch
A relief from the heat
That has engulfed
This house

Mist flows
Through
The corridor
The weather
Outside is frightful

That however
Is no comparison
To the storm
Brewing between
Your legs

Our lips meet
Similar
To the shaking
Of hands
Agreeing
On this union
To take place
As my hand
Grazes your

Anatomy
You tremble
With anticipation
Of the
Orgasimic
Pleasures that await you

My tongue
Searches
Your body
Seeking
Treasures unknown

As your
Sea of love
Over takes me
I fear nothing
I am
In the softest
Place on earth

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

You Don't Know Me

You smile
And greet me
Everyday
As your
Enticing eyes
Draw me closer
The smell
Of your
Perfume
Makes me melt
It must
Be spiked
With something
I follow you around
Like
A lost
Puppy
I feel like
I'm playing myself
Fighting a losing battle
But then you
Tell me
"You look nice"
And my hope
Is renewed
That one
Sweet day
You will be mine
But
You
Don't
Know
Me
And I wonder
If you ever will

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Home

Another sunny day
Makes me wish
I could see you
But you're
So far
Away
I have letters
That
I've wrote to
You
But it
Was never
The right time
To send them
It's to late now
The cancer
That is me
Ate away
At the bond
We shared
Your last image
Was waving goodbye
You deserve better
Than the man
I was at the time
Thank you
For loving me
When I didn't love
Myself

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Forgotten

Tonight I am giving you the reader more insight into my life and the places I have been. I've attempted suicide twice. Once in 2003 and again in 2005. This poem takes me back to those times when I felt like I couldn't share anything with anyone.

Seems like
The world
Thinks
I am
Dead
In the
Figurative sense
I am
Haven't been myself
For a while now
Maybe I gave up
Too soon
Tired of others
Plotting it
So I brought about
My own doom
Suicidal thoughts
Who could ever imagine
The one
That shouldered
All the hopes
And dreams
Of the family
Could fall victim
To the devil

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Free

Movement
Is so
Effortless
Though
Every step
Is carefully calculated
It looks
Spontaneous
Standing
On the hood
Of the car
Going down
The interstate
Arms spread
Head tilted
Tip of my nose
Pointed towards
The sun
And
No worries
Wind
Invades my nose
Dry drowning
Convinced
I am
Invincible
Never knowing
Of a after life
Because
Once I leave this one
I start a new
Somewhere else 

© 2010 All rights reserved

Family Affair

The smell
From the kitchen
Fills my nostrils
It reminds me
Of days gone by
As I look
At the youth
I am reminded
Of how I have grown
The pictures
In the corridor
Tell stories
Ones
That reminds me
Of my
Mortality
How I wish
We could
Hop
In a time machine
And go back
But we can’t
They say its
Never too late
I just wish
That I could tell you
I love you
One more time
Grand ma

(C) 2010 All rights reserved

Rainy Nights

The
Liquid sunshine
I was told
When I was
Younger
It means
Somewhere
God
Is saving a life
The dirt
That has
Stained
My soul
Is washed away
Rebirth
I feel like
Lazarus
This shell
Has lied
Dormant
For so long
With
A few drops
Of this
Elixir
It springs
Back to life
I no longer
Ask
For the rain
To go away
I welcome it
For after
The sunshines bright

(C) Steve Logan
2010

When Your Hair Turns Grey

Hello love
Seems like
Yesterday
We meet
Such a happy
Pair
Who knew
We
Would
Make it
This far
Taking
Things slow
1st as friends
Both agreeing
We were
Happy being single
And enjoying
The others company
Now as I look
Back on my past
I realize
This is what
True love
Is about
My heart rate
Still spikes
At the mention
Of your name
And pictures
Do the same
Time has
Been kind
To us both
Though we have
Many wrinkles
We've kept
Our spirits high
People often ask
"Why do you have that spring in your step still"
I just smile
And tell them
It's because of the love
Of my life
The secret to my reason
For living
My wife

(C) 2010

Press Conference

The lights
Are hot
Burning
My skin
As
I
Sit down
Feedback
Comes from
The microphone
My throat
Is dry
I take a
Sip of water
Cameras flash
Everyones
Anticipating
What I
Have to
Say
I let
The crowd know
I am a flawed man
As if
That will
Keep them
From painting
Me
As the villain
I make mistakes
However
Being just a man
Is no reason
To have done
What I've done
But
How dare
All you fellow
Sinners
Throw stones
At me
Look in the mirror

Mad World (pain in my pen)

This world
Is ever
Changing
Seems like
Natural
Disasters
Are the norm
Loved ones
Meeting their maker
In and out of hearses
Used to be sacred
Now
Our youth
Are shooting up churches
I can’t take
So for
Hours on end
I stay
In deep
Meditation
Read 5 chapters a day in the bible
Minister to the children
On the coming of
Christ
Can improve our current situation


© Steve Logan
2009

Seasons Change

The sun
Is
Setting
A little
Later
Day by day
The temperature
Steadily rises
As I
Give the
Last will
And
Testament
To the old me
I smile
Walking
Away
From the grave
Excited about
The new life
I have
Found my purpose
I leave
Behind
Many friends
In order for
Me to grow
They must
Become past tense
I can't
Blame them
My sins
Are mine alone
It's not your fault
I just
Believe
I need to
Be more
Elevated
To the city
Of the streets
Paved with gold
Take a seat
Beside
My savor

Night Classes

Coming from
Where I'm from
People frown upon it
Seems you're not
Black enough
If you have a degree
Rather work a 9 - 5
And improve
To remove yourself
From the hell
That is your life
So here you are
Rushing to class
Some of your classmates
Looking at you funny
Because you still have
Your fast food uniform on
No shame in that
Its a job
With legal money
You have to make
A little dough
So you can have some bread
Allow me to say
I admire you
No matter how hard it gets
Don't ever give up

Endangered

Once upon a
Time
We
Were a strong unit
Not bound by blood
But
The love
Of the literary arts
Never to
Disrespect
Even
When it wasn't
Socially acceptable
I treat poetry
Like my wife
I will protect her
And attack
If anyone
Speaks bad to you
Abusing the culture
How dare they
Be so rude
Now they use your name
To get women
Like some pick up line
Go on profanity
Laced tirades
And people
Say that they represent you?
Livid with the waste
That has been spewed
Out of so called
"Warriors" mouths
Allow me to place the mussel on them

Dreamer

How does it feel?
The movie
That plays
In your head
Every night
Has some how
Manifested
Into
3-D
The castle in the air
Has been built
A kingdom
Fit for its
King
Loyal subjects
And in this
Manor
A queen
I've been praying
And wishing
On countless stars
To find her
She makes me
Feel
Invincible
Empowered by
The love she gives me
As our lips touch
I feel as if we're
Floating in orbit
Just two lovers
As close to
Heaven
As any have ever been
Without passing
To the plain
Where the angels play
I open my eyes
Her wings shoot to the sides
As I fall back to earth
A dream or a cruel joke?
I guess its not time for me
To meet my angel

(C) Steve Logan 2009

Lifeline

Without it
I would
Be dead
You
Would never
Have read this
Doomed
To be another
Black youth
Wandering
This earth
Path of self destruction
For what?
A nice car
A few cloudy diamonds
The love
That comes from
The type
Of women
That will leave
When bad times come
I found
A purpose
"Soul speaker"
Minister through words
I feed the spirits
Of whom should decide
To look over
The blood I leave on pages
My life story
Not ashamed of any of it
Good or bad
I'm still standing
To me that's glory

Monster Under The Bed

Silly children
They say the darnest things
Imagination runs wild
They even think their imaginary friend is a actual human being

You have the parents that take everything their child says with a grain of salt
The child tells her mother
That mommy's new boy friend has been touching her
And this sad excuse for a woman says her own daughter is at fault!

You do realize this is your child right?

She thinks he told me
A child lied on him before and said he touched them
But she knows him so well
That she blows off all facts

The child cries when she leaves for work
Who wants to be left alone with a monster
That takes advantage of their young age and small stature

A monster
Sick excuse of a human
If this
Was your child
What would you?

Her mother turned
A blind eye
So the daughter
Took matters
Into her own hands

30 some odd knife wounds
Later
She finally
Vanquished
The monster under her bed

(C) 2010
Steve Logan
All rights reserved

City Walls

Companies closing every corner you turn
No middle class so it's feast or famine
Government bailing out banks printing money like they got it to burn
Left to swim with waters racing against them like their salmon
Feeling like you're no longer apart of America
Like you did something wrong because you are in exile
What about the single mothers?
They can't afford to buy food so they put cans in their purse when they walk down the store aisle
What do you do when you can't even go the McDonald's to get a job?
Left out in the streets with a family to feed so you have no choice but to rob
I would rather drop down to my knees and praise God
Without the bad times we can't possibly have good
But how can you treat the ghetto like a 3rd world country?
And expect for that stance to be understood

Goodbye

I stand before you
A broken man
But I am wise
Beyond
My years
With the pain
Has come knowledge
That I carry with me
Like a textbook
Emotional
Battle wounds
The bleeding
Has stopped
Thanks
To the high end
Field dressing
I used on my scars
Goodbye
Heartache
Goodbye
To being a fool
For love
Quote the poet
Never more